Josie Canseco’s Some Feelings

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I have never tried to cultivate the hopes you left in me in others. I didn’t try to love someone else with the love you left in me. I have always remained faithful to the wounds and pain you left in me. Well, what did you do to be loved like this?

I made a picture of my favorite smile and always kept you under my pillow.

I’ve never used people as band-aids. I didn’t let anyone else heal the wound you left on me.

Seen, you loved someone else with the love I taught you. You touched someone else… Now you are very different to me, very…

Undoubtedly, I have entrusted my heart to you. And the most beautiful place. I entrusted my most meaningful feelings to you. What you did was nothing but betraying the trust. I burned the sea inside me for you. I thought you were worth it.

Feelings you could never think of have always pierced my heart. But you didn’t notice for a second, thank you.

How many times will this heart beat for you to understand some feelings? How many times will it break?

Do you know? I no longer have the strength to break apart. And remember, for the first time, I hated the smile you hide under my pillow. For smiling at anyone but me. And now you’re the partner of my biggest regret.

I didn’t even realize what I was doing by trying to make someone who never existed in my life to be where I couldn’t.

Tears filled my eyes even when I dreamed of hugging you.

My heartbeat was accelerating.
Imagine if we hugged…
I’m out of the heart now.
But to you….

My longing is sinking inside me now, I can’t say.
I’ll shut up, you understand.
This time I’ll go and you cry a little.

Love me, I will never forget this kindness.

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